It’s a Tuesday, and the last sliver of the sun just dropped behind the distant hills and it’s now dusk. You had a horrendous day at work, attending several meetings, responding to several dozen e-mails, and talking to hordes of people telephonically. You’re finally free to go home, but then you remember you’ve got nothing for dinner. So, you point your car in the direction of your favorite supermarket.
Pulling into the parking lot, you’re dismayed to find that lot of people didn’t have anything to fix for dinner and, just like you, are searching for a parking space near the door of the market. Finally, you give up and grab the first spot you see.
As you exit your vehicle, you lock your car doors and whip out your cell phone to call your spouse. You want to advise him he needs to pick up your child from day care because you’re at the market.
Suddenly, a man steps in front of you. He’s pointing an ominous gun at your chest and telling you to give him your phone, and wallet. You’re stunned and don’t move. The man gets mad jerks the gun closer to your face. “I said, give me your stuff!” You still don’t move and he snatches your phone from your hand, and yanks your purse from your shoulder. Then he turns and runs through the parking lot and leaps into a waiting car. The car burns rubber as it flees the scene.
You look around the parking lot to see if anyone else seemed to notice what just happened to you. Blissfully unaware of the recent drama in their vicinity, your fellow citizens go on about their business. Bewildered, you make your way into the market and grab the first employee you see and ask them to call the police – you’ve been robbed.
Okay, so how many of you have rehearsed what you would do if confronted by an armed gunman in a parking lot? What about in your home? Have you considered what action you would take if you were at a concert and your section of the arena collapsed? What if you were at the mall and 7.0 earthquake occurred? Do you get the idea I’m leading to the title of this article…Dress Rehearsal?
One of the things police officers are taught in the Police Academy is to be aware of our surroundings and think in terms of worst case scenario and what if…
I highly recommend that you start thinking in those terms as well. (By the way, I do recommend giving up your property. Property can be replaced – you can’t.) As you go about your daily activities, be in the moment – pay attention to what’s going on around you. In these days of technology and multi-tasking, it’s so easy to be distracted from what you’re doing. And that distraction could cost you.
Another thing about planning ahead…it can take away some of the anxiety you might feel when unexpectedly confronted with adverse conditions. In the scenario I’ve presented of a parking lot robbery, if long ago, you’ve already decided to give up your property, that’s one aspect where you know what will be happening. Instead of focusing on, Gosh, I’m scared, (that’s a given, so plan for it), Should I give up my wallet? What about my jewelry? Instead, you can be looking at the suspect trying to sear his image into your brain, looking for something distinctive about him (or her) – tattoos, piercings, missing, broken, or gold teeth. Maybe he has a mole on his nose or under an eye.
In your dress rehearsal, you’ve already done a run through where the robber ran to a waiting car – in fact, you’ve considered the best escape routes a suspect might take so you aren’t surprised when your robber runs in exactly that direction to a waiting car. Because you’re not surprised, you have an extra couple seconds to look at that escape vehicle and see what color it is, whether it has tinted windows, custom wheels, or maybe traffic collision damage – anything that will make the car stand out for officers searching for the suspects.
There is one thing I know about dress rehearsals…they work. You can bet the crooks out there are practicing their lines, their moves, and their plans. In fact, there are some crooks who have long-running performances – with occasional breaks for jail time. You should be rehearsing your thoughts and actions as well; because in this type of performance you don’t want to be doing improvisation.
Kathy: thank you! This is great knowledge to have. I participated in a mock set up of a robbery once where the unarmed cop(acting as a robber) demanded my purse etc. It was unnerving to say the least. Then he pulled out his weapon and stuck it in my ribs. To say that upped the stakes, even pretend, is an understatement.
This was in Phoenix, and they also said don’t ever let them get you in a car. Drop roll, throw up, whatever you have to, make the hugest scene of your life, etc. because if they get you out into that desert….
Do you have any tips for this scenario? Great blog. Thank you!
Hi Kath
Thanks for this it. It makes me think about an incident that just recently occurred.
I was at the market. Took my basket to my car. It was NOT in a dark area of the lot. Only a few slots down from the front.
As I popped open the back to start putting groceries in the rear of the car, the passenger door to a really old, maybe 70s era, van on my driver side opened. I stepped sideways to watch to ensure the door didn’t touch my car, since the van was parked so close, then went back to unloading.
A guy got out, and tottered towards me. He had a cigarette he was holding to his mouth. “I just got out of the hospital,” he said. “Do you have a match?”
He was shaking. He had a tattoo of what looked like a 1/2 moon or something similar ringed halfway around his eye from mid brow to mid lash beneath. I shook my head and said “sorry, I don’t.” And finished loading my car. He didn’t way anything, just went back to the passenger door, which remained open… almost into my driver door, and stood there.
Rehearsal: What do you do when there is a van next to your car on the drivers side and it looks suspicious? Not to mention a guy actually standing outside the door… I always told my kids to get in on the passenger side… but that leaves the drivers side unlocked. SO next planned thought kicks in… I took the basket back to the front of the store and went inside to get an escort. By the time we got back out to my car, the van was backing out. Despite tinted windows, I could see a woman was driving. There was no sign of anyone in the passenger side seat. The guy was evidently hiding now.
I felt foolish asking the store manager to accompany me out to my car, but my planning side tells me I would not have done it any differently
Not the way I wanted to start my Monday, but certainly something I needed to hear. Distraction seems to be the order of the day, especially with cell phones, and I agree we all need to be far more aware of our surroundings.
The problem with rehearsing, for me anyway, is I imagine I have one helluva great karate sidekick (which I don’t possess!) and in my rehearsal I ALWAYS save my own behind!
Guess I’d better get more realistic, eh?
Thanks for another solid blog.
As a mystery and suspense writer, I think about terrible situations, but not necessarily how I would react in one. Thanks for an excellent eye-opener, Kathy.
Great tips, Kathy!! I’m going to send my kids and hubby to read this today!! It’s a good strategy to live by. Thanks for posting!
Great tips, Kathy. I do know, like Donnell mentioned, NEVER get in the car with someone even if he’s pointing a gun at you. I figure chances are the guy’s not going to want to shoot you in the parking lot with people around and I’d rather risk getting shot in a public place than dragged off to God-knows-where.
Thanks for the reminder, Kath. I also have Lynne’s imagination issue about the great pretend karate moves. My other plan is to throw the purse at the robber but over his head (or with the weight of my purse possibly at his head) and then run screaming fire towards the store while weaving like a mad woman. Oh, and I always get in the passenger side of my car anytime a panel van is parked next to me. You can always turn off your alarm and then open only the passenger side with your key. When I’ve been confronted by sexual deviants exposing themselves to me, I’ve usually ended up freezing in place and laughing hysterically. Oddly, enough this used to make them run or drive away. Apparently hysterical laughter when they whipped out their genitals was not the reaction each was looking for. The good thing technological advances is that no one crank calls anymore. I used to hate those calls at “Do you have any idea what time it is” a.m.
Now I want to take another self defense class….
Hi Donnell!
Thank you for coming by.
I believe you were told correctly…don’t get into the car. I’d never heard of the vomit thing…but if you can ‘vomit on demand’ seems like a good ploy to use.
If you were somehow dragged or lured into a car, I’d try to ‘safely’ crash the car. What I mean by that is so no other people could get injured. I’d rather be killed in those circumstances than to have some low-life slit my throat.
Hi Randi!
Welcome! It sounds to me like you handled it perfectly. The fact that the guy wasn’t visible in the van as it drove off could mean he was hiding or had wandered away while you were in the store. Either way, you did the smart thing…get someone to accompany you.
Hi Lynne!
Thanks for commenting. Yeah, I suspect many of us are quite the warriors – or as they say – legends in our own minds.
I can tell you that crooks are actively seeking out victims who are distracted. And if you’ve got a cell phone to your ear or Ipod earphones in your ears, you are not only distracted, but you’re advertising you’ve got good stuff to take.
I hope this post will help people to be aware. Thank you for stopping by.
Hi Linda!
I suspect you’ve even written your characters out of tough spots…now apply it to your own ‘scenes’!
Thank you for visiting.
Hi Charlene!
Welcome back.
Thank you for forwarding the post. I think about my blog subjects and try to make them informative. I appreciate you appreciating the info.
Thank you for coming by.
Hi Carol!
Thank you for commenting.
Yep…and it’s never too early pass AGE APPROPRIATE tips on to your kids. So many parents are afraid of scaring their children. Even more scary is if some weirdo gets them!
Hi Maria!
Ha ha! I too have mentally rehearsed throwing my purse at an attacker. Or…telling him I’m getting my wallet and then coming out with a gun.
As for the flashers – I think laughing is a good tactic. You probably scar them for life – or at the very least, hurt their ego just a little.